Family Day, as it is officially called, is a statutory holiday enjoyed by residents of Alberta. The day is spent like most holidays with families going on sojourns such as ski trips, going to movies, and just basking in the fact they do not have to go to work like their Saskatchewan counterparts. Additionally, many former Saskatchewan residents now living in Alberta also take the time to act like arrogant pricks towards their neighbors to the east.
“Yeah, I phoned my cousin in Regina and reminded him that I have the day off simply because I live in Alberta and am an Albertan,” said Lorne Rita, a refridgeration mechanic in Calgary, “I used to live in Saskatchewan so I know all about having to go to work when it's colder than my wife after a disagreement.”.... ....Continued Rita: “So, my cousin's like 'screw you' and I'm like, 'well, if you move to Alberta, you won't have to listen to me brag about the day off' and he's like 'but I like being a failure and I'm queer' and I'm like, 'well, i'm off to roll around on the pile of money I made this week from our prosperity cheques'.”
Other Alberta residents decided to not be as prickish.
“I just phoned my parents to wish them a happy family day,” said Marlene Olater of Red Deer, “We had a nice talk about the days when I lived in Saskatchewan and how much more successful I am now that I'm in a province with an free market economy not controlled by unions.
For what it's worth, Saskatchewan has considered adding a mid winter holiday of it's own that would be similar to Alberta's. While not finalized yet, leading suggestions for naming the holiday include, “We're Not Manitoba” Day.
Freaking hilarious if you ask me.
1 comment:
I've checked it out a few times, but they never seem to update, which is upsetting. They've got some very good satirical news stories.
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